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January 27, 2006
karma quest -- day 6.3
we're driving down route 465 or something and just humming through the tailings of the ozarks and this barn went flying past, something written on the side of it. we blew on by, chattering about snacks and dinner and this and that. we had just barely escaped the moebius-strip of the ring road around Branson (Mike Oscar), a city that is arranged in a perfect replica of a sitting device made by the Bemis Manufacturing Corporation (seriously, click the link!) (sometime, when the karma tanks are full to bursting, i'll be able to gather my wits and stablize my intestines enough to tell the story of Branson)... so we breezed past this barn and then i noticed the karmometer was spinning up fast.
i watched it spin until it stopped on "farma" (that's farm karma, in case your karmometer calibrating days are hazy memories), so we slowed the truck down and turned around until the reading was at it's maximum.
without comment, i present the image daffodil captured of the barn:
....well, i'm sorry, i have to comment.
USED COWS?
i've been so tempted to call Melvin to find out just what is it, a used cow, but i just can't decide whether to try him on his cell, in the house, or in the barn.... i will say this: if you are looking for used cows & bulls, i can vouch for two things: Melvin keeps a tidy spread, and you can get all the farma you can use there.
posted by matthew at 06:47 PM
We own sixteen timeshares in Branson as well as a few hundred used cows. Did you know that Melvin uses our product?
We invite all Letters from the Moon friends to submit photos of their toilets for our online gallery.
posted by: Dick and Peter Bemis on January 27, 2006 08:07 PM
With a name like Melvin Thogmartin, what are you going to do in life but sell used cows?
posted by: Jack on January 27, 2006 08:08 PM
i gotta admit, scoping out the bemis website filled my cup with pure bliss, go check out http://www.bemismfg.com/ if you want to learn more about what it is to be fundamentally american.
posted by: matt on January 27, 2006 08:34 PM
aw, don't worry about used cows. as long as they come with a full service record that itemises all parts and labour you can't go wrong.
there are some unscrupulous used cow traders around who cut 'em up and put together bits and pieces from stolen cows but a close inspection of the merchandise usually reveals the truth... just look out for the units that can't stand up or don't eat grass.
posted by: Derek on January 28, 2006 07:06 AM
Oh, and for the Dick and Peter,
I always liked a seat with a sharp point to it: Ouch!
posted by: Derek on January 28, 2006 07:48 AM
I.......really can't think of anything meaningful to say about this.
(Pause to ponder)
Nope, not a thing.
posted by: Carroll on January 28, 2006 03:09 PM
I wanted to stop the car so we could examine the used cows and choose the one who seemed to be the most fun. I figured we could strap one to the trunk and pitch snacks at him through the moo-n roof.
But Melvin wasn't answering his phones. What kind of cow salesman is that?!
posted by: Daffodil on January 29, 2006 09:43 AM
Melvin might do better selling
"Certified, Pre-Owned Cows"
Its all in the branding...no pun intended
posted by: Jim in NY on January 30, 2006 03:58 PM